Have you ever felt that way? As a little girl, I often felt that my words had fallen on deaf ears. I’d share moments with family and friends, pouring out my heart of concerns, funny stories, wise advice, and lessons learned, but I always felt unheard and overlooked. Growing up in a large family and falling in the category of the “baby girl” with four beautiful and amazing sisters ahead of me didn’t help me process these feelings any easier.
What is this overwhelming presence of feeling unheard and overlooked which morphed into symptoms of feeling unimportant and worthless? I dealt with these emotions the best I could as a little girl. I strategically planned my defense, making sure I was louder than anyone else, perfecting the skill of attention seeking, controlling whatever and whomever I could, and holding hostage the attention of anybody who would look my way. To my surprise, this worked perfectly… until it didn’t.
Growing into a young woman now being faced with real life traumas, intimate relationships, and grown folk situations, I witnessed these very unhealthy character traits grow into a monster of unacceptability which had me spiraling even more. Crawling into a fetal position of insecurity, guilt, and shame made me angry and fighting for every breath to prove to others that I was worthy of being heard.
The problem was I didn’t really believe I was worthy – so trying to convince someone else of that fact was nearly impossible.
Long Story Short
Boy was it eye-opening to discover I had nothing to prove to anybody and the only attention I’ve ever needed was that of Jesus! After being beaten down by life, I finally realized that I needed God. But not just any god! I needed “The God,” the “One and Only.” The One who created me into this beautiful ball of complex character traits, with a big heart, big mouth, and big personality.
Who knew that while I was struggling to get the attention and be heard by mere man, Abba was listening to me the whole time? Who knew He saw me and had plans for my life? Who knew He felt all my hurts, disappointments, and discouragement? Who knew that at such a young age the enemy (the great deceiver) had his eyes on me, planting the seeds of feeling unheard, unseen, and unimportant, trying to foil the AMAZING PLANS GOD HAD for my life? Who knew that our Father God could take what the devil meant for evil and turn it around for my good, His glory, and make it into something beautiful?! Who knew, that once I knew I had His ear and His attention that my desire to have yours wouldn’t matter?
Today, I never worry about being heard, understood, or accepted. My intimate relationship with Jesus and His love for me graciously mandates it. Giving my life to Christ was the absolute best decision I could have ever made.
Now, when I am with my big and brilliant family, they all listen to me, not because I’m the wisest or holiest but because they always have. Plus, I still have the BIGGEST MOUTH AND THE BIGGEST PERSONALITY!!! And yep, I am still a work in progress!!
Be Assured that our Father Hears Us
And this is the confidence that we have toward Him, that if we ask anything according to His will,He hears us (1 John 5:14, ESV).
I cried to Him with my mouth, and high praise was on my tongue. If I had cherished iniquity in my heart, the Lord would not have listened. But truly God has listened; He has attended to the voice of my prayer. Blessed be God because He has not rejected my prayer or removed His steadfast love from me (Psalm 66:17-20, ESV).
Call to Me and I will answer you and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known (Jeremiah 33:3, ESV).
If you need support and would like to be surrounded by loving, Christian peers who empathize with your situation and care about walking with you through this season of your life, please consider joining one of the many support groups offered at Tuesday Night Care.
If you need help or support, please contact Care.
If you are looking for activities where you can meet others, check out our Events.
If you are looking for people to do life with, connect with our Groups.