Most of the world doesn’t get all of you. You hold back. You show shades of who you are in different situations. You self-edit. You try to be what others will find palatable. But if you’ve ever longed for more freedom just to be who you are, keep reading, because there is a place.

Pouring out your heart may be something you’ve rarely—or never—done, and I’m right there with you because maybe you’ve noticed: listening isn’t a skill everyone has.

The Pouring

People don’t always want the pouring out from you. They want a “tasting,” like one of those free samples at the grocery store. More and more, I find myself in places where I had hoped for conversation, for sharing, for connection… but I left feeling like there was no room for me to speak.

I wanted to open up, but no one in that room asked me a real question. Or they did… but then they talked over me when I started to share. Before I could say anything too personal, they made it about them.

Sometimes someone does ask me a question, and I begin to share a story only to be interrupted by a noise, or someone saying, “Could you pass the ketchup?” The conversation is hijacked. My story is just left out there, and no one circles back to it. I call those “danglers.” You start to open up, and now part of you is just dangling, but the others have moved on to another topic.

The Block

Sometimes we are unable to express ourselves because it’s just the wrong time or we are with the wrong people. Sometimes it’s just not the right place.

You see, I am a slow, simmering banquet with many layers. It takes a while to get to the main course with me—but I want to. I require time, because I don’t share in bullet points. Efficiency is not my goal. What I long for is understanding… and to be understood.

The Contrast

A few weeks ago, I spent a weekend away with dear friends I’ve known for decades. They asked me questions—real ones. They drew me out.

I couldn’t sneak away or hide or give them just a short “appetizer” of an answer. They wanted the banquet, so I shared my heart.

It was honest.
It was wonderful.
It was safe.

This was the right time with the right people in the right place, and they genuinely wanted to hear from me. It was so refreshing.

The Invitation

I can laugh about those negative experiences now, and I make it my mission to leave no danglers out there when others are sharing. It’s my way of covering people when they are vulnerable enough to share. Our attention spans are getting shorter and shorter, and we must find ways to expand our capacity to listen.

Here’s the beautiful thing—this kind of safe, wholehearted pouring out is available not just with friends or family, but it’s available to you in your relationship with Jesus. When you talk to Him, there is space for you to be you.

You don’t have to bullet point your feelings.
You don’t have to edit yourself to sound “more holy.”
You don’t have to hold back.

Jesus wants you to POUR out your heart. He wants ALL of you. This is where transformation happens. You being honest before God.

“Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge” (Psalm 62:8)

When was the last time you let it all out?

Jesus is the right time, the right Person, and no matter where you are, He is the right place.